I looked at the video that was posted on the OCA website about Dorota Kazmierak’s work and was really impressed. Her quality and voice are striking. She has put so much thought and time in her work which shows in the outcome and quality of the photographs.
Most of the times when I see work that I’m really impressed with I get inspired and want to try harder to come to a point in which I feel that I am doing a good job, but other times I am afraid that my own practice and work will never be good enough. Thoughts come up about not having the right gear, not being creative enough, never taking the time to work on the fine details, not being in the right place, having 4 kids, never finishing anything anyway, having too many other distractions and not being part of an art scene.
I know this is just the negative mind frame that I lock myself up in. Of course there is always room for improvement and there will always be people who do a better job than I do. And that is absolutely fine, very healthy actually. Besides that, shouldn’t creating art be about finding my own style and self? Shouldn’t the time in which I am studying not be a period in which there is room for failure, experimenting and learning?
I do know that I often just happen to photograph in a certain way without really thinking about it beforehand and that my style is going from here to there. I want to spend time to think about the work and styles that I like and admire and strive to create that. It all has to do with taking the time, challenging myself, while staying positive and striving for the highest quality possible.
Doing an art’s degree is so different than any other study: It’s not just working towards an other exam or paper, but about building a skill, developing a voice, having an opinion and create work that evokes. It’s a lot to ask for and not as straightforward as just working through the exercises.
I battle with it, tell myself not to get bogged down and just keep on going. So I’ll pour myself an other cup of coffee, give myself a compliment about having written an other post and carry on!